I was on Twitter last night, and I was following the #SB1070 hash trying to make heads-and-tails of what was going on. To my surprise, what I found out was that no matter what side you are on, you are most likely bat-turd crazy.

This is how it all began:

I was reading about SB1070 on a news site that comes into my daily feed, and like always, I wanted to see what the twitter world was saying about it.

Please keep in mind, I respect everyone that I mention for their dedication to their beliefs (just not their delivery of their beliefs). I am not going to say whether or not I agree with ANY of this, but I just felt like sharing.

Ok, so, before I get into any details, I am going to tell all of you that I don’t know where I stand on the bill. I am a legal resident of the USA, born and raised. So whether bill gets accepted/rejected/redacted/suspended/etc doesn’t really mean a whole lot to me. You are probably going to argue that it SHOULD matter to me, but considering I don’t feel like hearing YOUR reasoning behind why it matters to you, I’m just going to tell you to save your breath, I’ll remain ignorant and life WILL go on.

Ok, so back to the point here. I was on twitter, and I started reading some of the posts about SB1070. Below are some of the tweets that I read, these are not my words, they are words of other people either for/against SB1070.

From the Mouth of Warof2012 (who blocked me after I posed my opinion about what he said): He sent a warning to “wetbacks” saying that we will take our country back.

Here’s the post that started everything:

Warof2010: @speakeasy602 @cihouses @ConeyJoey @littlebytesnews @Ziggy_Daddy @LuissLozano Our objective, American Patriots http://bit.ly/cy9nNt (about 20 hours ago from web in reply to speakeasy602)

I responded to him saying that the article seemed a little radical. That’s when he responded with a load of racism. I don’t want to waste any more time on this person, I get pissed off just thinking about what he was saying.

Then, I read from @Patweathington that cops need to stop eating their donuts and enforce illegal immigration (no exact quote available, she blocked me too). I tried to explain to her that she should not hate the cops, that they work hard enforcing state laws, and they are not responsible for federal enforcement, but she immediately got on the defensive, and posted some of the following tweets:

Patweathington: @speakeasy602 U must support liars & #USA #illegalaliens being liars & find it delicious yourself. Or U would be repulsed by it. R/T #SB1070

Patweathington: @speakeasy602 #SB1070 Compassion 4 liars. They will burn in HELL as the bible says. They need 2 seek Gods ways & stop lying about who they R

Patweathington: @speakeasy602 #SB1070 who am I 2B compassionate 4. The laws the law. So U find laws repulsive. Well, so does Lucifer, Hes the father of lies

Patweathington: @speakeasy602 What have I said thats hateful, but talk about #SB1070 & how I support legal immigration & not liars? Yeap Lucifers talking 2U

Ask me how I feel, I promise I’ll tell you

I wasn’t aware that this law was a good versus evil debate. I thought that it was a debate on illegal immigration, not really sure where I went wrong.

Just so there’s no confusion about where I stand. I was not replying to all of these people to protest their side of the debate, I was just pointing out their venomous remarks. Regardless of what they said, both sides did have some very valid arguments, so credit where it’s due.

This was actually an experiment to see how willing people are to understand both sides of an issue before spreading their hate, and I did not expect these folks to be so damn defensive and aggressive.

Kudos to all of you for standing strong in your convictions, but I wish you would spread your words with fact and not so much hateful rhetoric. It’s the whole splinter in the eye issue, only instead of a splinter, it’s peoples’ lives, and the safety of our country. Issues like this need to be handled delicately, and with care for your fellow human. Just because they live on the other side of a border doesn’t make them any less human than you.

Oh also, this issue is not a religious issue, so to those of you who are using the bible to make your point, you are an embarassment to your fellow christians. Just because someone crosses the border illegally, it doesn’t mean they’re evil, it means that they’re deparate for a better life.

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Last weekend was fun. We ventured up to Blue Ridge (in the Coconino National Forest) in Northern Arizona. The purpose of our trip was a little more than escaping the 110 degree heat of Phoenix; it was planned to be a man’s getaway, and that is definitely what it was.

Due to my respect for story telling, I’m going to keep this post dry, and to-the-point.

Genesis

The trip began Friday morning. We drove Shane‘s father-in-law’s truck and boat up to the campground. On the way the transmission started making grinding noises. We decided to push on until the noise got so loud, we had no choice but to pull over and figure things out.

Bring the Rain That Covers the Earth in Water

When we got out of the truck it started raining. We had to use an old tarp to cover everything that was in the back of the truck. We were fortunate enough to find enough rope to scrap together enough to tie everything under the tarp down.

While hanging out on the side of the road, I found a fossile, not just any fossile, a sea shell fossile. Super prehistoric looking. My only explanation for the shell is that it must have rained really hard last week.

We Should Have Driven the Ark

Anyway, we putted along the old route 87, also known as the Pony Express Mail Route, until we got to a little mom and pop gas station. Keep in mind, I don’t know anything about cars, and Mike and Shane seemed to know less about them than I did. We popped the hood, crawled underneath the truck and started opening caps, measuring fluids, and kicking tires until we figured out what the problem was. The master cylinder was empty, so we bought some dot3 and moved on once again.

Our Arrival

We finally arrived at the campsite. It was still raining. The mud was thick and nasty, so we unpacked as fast as we could and found shelter. While the rain was dissipating, we thought it would be virtually impossible to get a fire started.

Our Hunt for Wood

The only dry wood in the forest seemed to be tree bark and buried stumps. So we stocked up, lit a road flare on fire and started the night.

Horse Shoes.. err.. Moose Poo’s

Shane and I set up the stakes for horse shoes in the “mud.” We played one of the best games of horse shoes ever. We blamed it on the fact that the horse shoes were covered in mud. We said it was like when olympians wipe their hands in chalk before grabbing the bars. It was epic, neck-and-neck the whole time.

The game was over, our hands were muddy, and Mike decided to point out that we placed the stake into a pile of moose poop. So… we washed our hands.

Stop on a Dime, Turn off a Cliff,

We woke up the next morning, got our fishing gear together and ventured to the lake. After 2 hours of situating ourselves, the boat was finally in the water, and the water was finally in the boat (headslap). We forgot to put in the drain plug and the boat started filling up with water. A few buckets later, we were ready to set sail. Bon Voyage mother f***ers..

THE WORDCOUNT ON THIS POST WAS OVER 1,000, AND MY BROWSER CRASHED, AND IT DIDN’T AUTOSAVE!!!! AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!

So, I’m sharpening my story-telling claws trying to write the scariest story possible for an upcoming camping trip with a couple friends. This is either going to be a ridiculous diplay of everything scary I could think to cram in the story, or, it’s going to be an act of sheer genius (the latter is a stretch).

I’ll post the story when I’m finished with it. But here’s a sneak peak:

There are 2 tribes: The Siboombis and the Washambis (this may or may not be stolen from Ace Ventura, When Nature Calls).  One tribe is cursed, the other tribe is not. There’s almost a west side story feel to part of it.

There are gruesome deaths and tales of folklore. There is a love story in there somewhere too. There’s a ghost in the story (of course, there has to be). And creepy dead people raoming the desert looking for murdered babies.

I hope you brought a change of pants, because you’re going to poop yourself when you read it.

So, I let my wife talk me into a diet… again.. and I just wanted to write about it to show everyone if it works or not. I’m on day 1 right now, and to be honest, I’m hungry, and the feeling is a little unpleasant. What’s the diet you ask? It’s the HCG diet.

Here’s how it works: I take 10 HCG drops under the tongue 3 times a day. I can only eat 500 calories every day of specific foods. The HCG is supposed to curb my appetite and transfer stored fat into my blood-stream to be burnt.

We’ll see how it goes. If you want to try it with me, get your free trial here. I recommend getting the free trial on a gift card so you don’t get pounded on your credit card. Shipping is like $2.00.